May 6th,May 6th,May 6th,May 6th,May 6th,May 6th,May 6th,May 6th,
Congratulations to Comrade Bob Ainsworth our totally inept Defence Secretary for bravely announcing the date of the election on Sky news yesterday. Loose tongues cost lives, they say. I bet Comrade Gordon wishes it is Bobs!
Can you imagine if 'Bob the Gob' (as he is now known) had been around in 1944?
"And I can tell Adolf one thing, if you think things will be the same after dawn on June 6th......... oops....can we do a retake?"
"No, this is a live interview you moron"
Best wishes comrades, Keir x
Monday, 25 January 2010
Friday, 22 January 2010
Comrade Jones under fire
Local hero and leader, Comrade Paul Jones has come under fire from those 'orrible oiks again. The problem is that Comrade Jones is a liar and is useless, which makes him ideal for my party AND to be our leader, but when he combines those two admirable attributes and becomes a 'useless liar', then, he does exactly what it says on the tin!
Comrade Jones, a word in your ear..... lying when calling someone a liar isn't the cleverest thing you can do, especially like now when you've been caught out. Tosser.
Oh hum.... this lot have had me turning in my grave so many times I get dizzy.
Best wishes comrades, Keir x
Comrade Jones, a word in your ear..... lying when calling someone a liar isn't the cleverest thing you can do, especially like now when you've been caught out. Tosser.
Oh hum.... this lot have had me turning in my grave so many times I get dizzy.
Best wishes comrades, Keir x
Wednesday, 20 January 2010
Another little wheeze
Shhh, keep this quiet but I'm going to let you in on a little secret. Make sure none of those 'orrible oiks BNP are looking over your shoulder and read on....
We know that their site gets loads more visitors than ours so we've come up with a cunning plan that even Comrade Baldrick would be proud of. Here it is.... hehehe, I really can't stop laughing at this one. Calm down Keir, calm down.
Right, here it is.......... one of our local comrades, a councillor actually, well maybe not a councillor but someone more intelligent (I suspect his 5 year old nephew) has come up with what they call a mirror site. Its a website address that is very close to the 'orrible oiks address but is really a duplicate address for our site, brilliant eh? So unsuspecting visitors searching for their site come to us lol, and not to them!!
Look comrades, I know some of you will find this petty and spiteful but hey, you're in the Labour Party, what did you expect? Petty and spiteful is our strength, negativity is our lifeblood.
And rumour has it that they have got a new website coming online shortly that will blow our poxy site out of the water, so what else can we do. I know some of you are not happy that Comrade Jude got us two grand for 'computer consultancy' with her expenses scam and we ended up with a two-bob site, but isn't that what we do best? Fleece the taxpayer and then waste it? Comrades, we should celebrate the fact that our site cost two grand and looks rank (bloody keyboard, R's and W's getting mixed up again!).
Anyway, keep our little wheeze a secret, don't let the oiks know.
Best wishes comrades, Keir x
We know that their site gets loads more visitors than ours so we've come up with a cunning plan that even Comrade Baldrick would be proud of. Here it is.... hehehe, I really can't stop laughing at this one. Calm down Keir, calm down.
Right, here it is.......... one of our local comrades, a councillor actually, well maybe not a councillor but someone more intelligent (I suspect his 5 year old nephew) has come up with what they call a mirror site. Its a website address that is very close to the 'orrible oiks address but is really a duplicate address for our site, brilliant eh? So unsuspecting visitors searching for their site come to us lol, and not to them!!
Look comrades, I know some of you will find this petty and spiteful but hey, you're in the Labour Party, what did you expect? Petty and spiteful is our strength, negativity is our lifeblood.
And rumour has it that they have got a new website coming online shortly that will blow our poxy site out of the water, so what else can we do. I know some of you are not happy that Comrade Jude got us two grand for 'computer consultancy' with her expenses scam and we ended up with a two-bob site, but isn't that what we do best? Fleece the taxpayer and then waste it? Comrades, we should celebrate the fact that our site cost two grand and looks rank (bloody keyboard, R's and W's getting mixed up again!).
Anyway, keep our little wheeze a secret, don't let the oiks know.
Best wishes comrades, Keir x
Monday, 18 January 2010
Backstabbing and Conniving - Perfect for my Party
See if you can keep up with current events........
Comrade Hoon stabbed Comrade Brown in the back but conniving Comrade Harriet scored two bulls eyes by knifing Comrade Hoon and Comrade Brown in one go. Comrade Hoon will tomorrow stab both Comrade Blair and Comrade Brown at the war crime tribunal as he tries to shift blame for his own incompetence, whilst neighbouring Ashfield comrades will have a go at stabbing Comrade Hoon and getting him de-selected. And news just reaches me that local Amber Valley comrades killed off Labour chances in the Brinsley by-election by telling supporters to vote Tory - just to keep the 'orrible oiks BNP out!
Phew, and they say politics isn't fun lol.
This is so much better than in my day when we all were fighting for a noble cause and not just self aggrandizement. I say we have a lot to be thankful for since the Marxists took over!
Best wishes comrades, Keir x
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Comrade Hoon stabbed Comrade Brown in the back but conniving Comrade Harriet scored two bulls eyes by knifing Comrade Hoon and Comrade Brown in one go. Comrade Hoon will tomorrow stab both Comrade Blair and Comrade Brown at the war crime tribunal as he tries to shift blame for his own incompetence, whilst neighbouring Ashfield comrades will have a go at stabbing Comrade Hoon and getting him de-selected. And news just reaches me that local Amber Valley comrades killed off Labour chances in the Brinsley by-election by telling supporters to vote Tory - just to keep the 'orrible oiks BNP out!
Phew, and they say politics isn't fun lol.
This is so much better than in my day when we all were fighting for a noble cause and not just self aggrandizement. I say we have a lot to be thankful for since the Marxists took over!
Best wishes comrades, Keir x
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Sunday, 17 January 2010
Comrade Jude gets Cromwelled!
I see that Comrade Jude is at number five in the list of most unpopular MPs over on this WEBSITE.
Personally I don't think people appreciate that Comrade Jude works very hard at being useless and sites like this show that the public don't appreciate Judes efforts at all. I know there is some debate amongst local comrades as to whether being so crap comes naturally to her, but comrades, even though she's never had a proper job in her life this shouldn't be taken as proof that she is naturally useless. I think it has taken her years of practice to get to such a high ranking position
Anyway, the site can't be very good because Comrade Hoon isn't in the top twenty five. The real debate should be whether Comrade Geoff or Comrade Jude should be highest on the list. And I'll leave that for you to chew over......
Best wishes comrades, Keir x
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Personally I don't think people appreciate that Comrade Jude works very hard at being useless and sites like this show that the public don't appreciate Judes efforts at all. I know there is some debate amongst local comrades as to whether being so crap comes naturally to her, but comrades, even though she's never had a proper job in her life this shouldn't be taken as proof that she is naturally useless. I think it has taken her years of practice to get to such a high ranking position
Anyway, the site can't be very good because Comrade Hoon isn't in the top twenty five. The real debate should be whether Comrade Geoff or Comrade Jude should be highest on the list. And I'll leave that for you to chew over......
Best wishes comrades, Keir x
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Thursday, 14 January 2010
M.E.S.S.
Doncha just love acronyms. Coming straight after our CRAP drive I have been asked to officially declare that local comrades are about to create a MESS (nothing new in that I hear you say).
The Marxist Electoral Support Scheme - MESS - is geared for our activists and councillors in that it is simple and takes just three easy steps.
STEP 1: Think of two/three people. They might be family members living away from home, they might be friends from another area or they might even be dead like me lol.
STEP 2: Register them to vote, and apply for a postal ballot.
STEP 3: Wait for the ballot papers to arrive, fill them in and send them off.
SIMPLES!
Your one vote becomes three, 100 votes become 1000 and 1000 votes become 3,000.
Many of our groups around the country use this postal vote scam, as do the Tories and Lib Dims, but we are the best.
Comrade Jude needs our help. People have realised that she is useless and only thinks of Amber Valley as a meal ticket. And as much as she tries to convince them that 'useless is good' they aren't buying it anymore. So much for gratitude!
So, there you have it. We are in a mess and we need a bigger MESS to get out of it. Good Labour logic eh?
Get registering comrades and I promise you no more acronyms!
Best wishes comrades, Keir x
('’)
The Marxist Electoral Support Scheme - MESS - is geared for our activists and councillors in that it is simple and takes just three easy steps.
STEP 1: Think of two/three people. They might be family members living away from home, they might be friends from another area or they might even be dead like me lol.
STEP 2: Register them to vote, and apply for a postal ballot.
STEP 3: Wait for the ballot papers to arrive, fill them in and send them off.
SIMPLES!
Your one vote becomes three, 100 votes become 1000 and 1000 votes become 3,000.
Many of our groups around the country use this postal vote scam, as do the Tories and Lib Dims, but we are the best.
Comrade Jude needs our help. People have realised that she is useless and only thinks of Amber Valley as a meal ticket. And as much as she tries to convince them that 'useless is good' they aren't buying it anymore. So much for gratitude!
So, there you have it. We are in a mess and we need a bigger MESS to get out of it. Good Labour logic eh?
Get registering comrades and I promise you no more acronyms!
Best wishes comrades, Keir x
('
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Getting Away With It!
Hehehehe.... lucky us! It looks like we've got away with having a dig about the Tories on Ripley Town Council wanting to put Council Tax up. Nobody seems to have noticed that our brave comrades who are running Codnor into the ground are going to put whopping great increases in FOR THE SECOND YEAR RUNNING! lol.
But well done to Comrade Emmas Williams for bravely trying to deflect his incompetence away from Codnor Parish onto the Borough Council.
I thought Comrade Emmas was a bit of a mard-arse for throwing a strop when he only held his seat by a few votes but he's made amends in my book by showing great fortitude in not letting it get to him and carrying on in his own incompetent way. As we say locally, nobody does incompetence as well as Comrade Emmas (except Comrades McCabe and Moon of course. Oh, and not forgetting Cato, Ward, Jones, Longdon, Fisher, Cox et al)
42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
Best wishes comrades, Keir x
But well done to Comrade Emmas Williams for bravely trying to deflect his incompetence away from Codnor Parish onto the Borough Council.
I thought Comrade Emmas was a bit of a mard-arse for throwing a strop when he only held his seat by a few votes but he's made amends in my book by showing great fortitude in not letting it get to him and carrying on in his own incompetent way. As we say locally, nobody does incompetence as well as Comrade Emmas (except Comrades McCabe and Moon of course. Oh, and not forgetting Cato, Ward, Jones, Longdon, Fisher, Cox et al)
42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
Best wishes comrades, Keir x
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